Last week I read a short devotional on the apostle John and how he referred to himself as “the one whom Jesus loved” and a team member referenced that in a morning devotional this week so I have really been thinking about that alot lately. I remember years ago when I first heard/read how John described himself as “the one whom Jesus loved” and how I thought that was a very bold statement and, honestly, it seemed like John thought rather highly of himself. I have come to realize though that that’s not the case at all. John had such a deep understanding of God’s love (read 1 John chapter 4 when you get a chance) and he realized that the fact that Jesus loved him was the most important thing about him. John understood that his primary identity in life wasn’t that he was a son, brother, fisherman, disciple, apostle, or evangelist…it was being “the one Jesus loves.”

That got me thinking…how differently would I see myself if my primary identity was not related to my greatest achievement or failure, what I have or have not done, my struggles, successes, or insecurities but instead seeing myself as “the one Jesus loves”? And how does that change the way that I see the people around me? Here is the fact: Jesus died for all of us. Because of that, we all get to refer to ourselves as “the one Jesus loves” and that changes everything. Jesus loved the worst version of me just as much as he will love the best version of me that is yet to come. I don’t know about you, but I often struggle to wrap my head around that kind of love, one that I did not earn and I certainly don’t deserve. That kind of love changes things though. It changes the way that I view myself, encouraging me to be kinder towards myself, more patient, forgiving, and willing to extend grace. It also changes the way that I see other people. I may not like or agree with the things that other people say or do, but they are still “the one Jesus loves” and that is how I need to see them first and foremost.

As we head into the second month of 2025 my goal is to continue to see myself and others the same way that John was able to see himself, which is the way Jesus sees us. I am Sarah, the one who Jesus loves. And his love changes everything.

Life lately…

This month we had 3 weeks of teams: one double barrio week and 2 weeks of barrio and construction teams. I am always glad to see returning friends and to make new ones! Last week there was a massage therapist that went out with the barrio team and this week’s team had a chiropractor. I am always so grateful to have people with these additional skill sets come and be a part of the medical teams. They bless the patients and our staff so much!

Earlier this month I took my dogs on a walk one evening and saw something crazy in the sky that could best be described as slow moving, shiny and colorful horizontal fireworks. It didn’t take long to find out that the SpaceX rocket ‘Starship’ had been launched from southern Texas and exploded while on its test flight, and it was the debris of the spacecraft that I had seen crossing the sky. I shared the video clips myself and a friend took of our different perspectives that night on Solid Rock’s social media…I will share the link in case you haven’t seen it! https://www.instagram.com/reel/DE7Uv3iO2vy/

This month it has really started to sink in just how quickly my time here is coming to an end. On the work level, I have been sharing more of the medical coordinator role with Kelsi and will continue to step back so that she hopefully feels comfortable and confident when I leave. On a personal level, I have started the process of going through my belongings and deciding what to pack, sell, or donate. This makes things very real but I am glad I am starting now so it doesn’t feel overwhelming at the end of March. I have also started the process of doing everything necessary to get my dogs back to the US with me, and the rabies blood titers came back good this month so they won’t have to be quarantined. There are still a lot of hurdles to jump through but this is a big positive step forward! On an emotional level, I have good days and bad days as I start mentally preparing for the transition back. There are days when I cry thinking about leaving here, and there are times when I am excited about what is to come when I move back to Illinois. I am working hard to balance these emotions and savor the time I have left here.

I will end this month’s blog by sharing a song that I have had on repeat since it came out this month – Can’t Steal My Joy!

Prayer requests

• Health and rest for our team here in San Juan
• For this period of transition before I move 
• That things all come together so that I am able to get my dogs back to the US with me